What to Do When Your Pet Dies: A Compassionate Guide for the First 72 Hours

If you just lost your pet, I'm so sorry. You're likely feeling overwhelmed, heartbroken, and uncertain about what to do next. This guide will walk you through the immediate practical steps while honoring your grief.

The moment you realize your beloved pet has passed is unlike any other. Your mind might feel blank, your heart might be racing, and you may be thinking: "What do I do now? Is this really happening?"

You're not alone. Every year, millions of pet parents face this moment, and the confusion you're feeling is completely normal. This guide is here to help you navigate the first 24-72 hours with practical steps and gentle support.

If your pet is still with you but showing signs of decline, our guide to recognising the signs in senior dogs may help you prepare.

The First Hour: Immediate Steps

1. Confirm and Accept What Happened

If your pet passed at home, take a moment to be with them. There's no rush. Sit with them, touch them if you feel comfortable, say goodbye in your own way. This moment, as painful as it is, can be an important part of your grieving process.

If you're unsure whether they've passed:

• Check for breathing by placing your hand near their nose
• Feel for a heartbeat on their chest
• Look for any movement or response to touch
• When in doubt, contact your vet immediately

2. Contact Your Veterinarian

Even if your pet passed at home and not at the clinic, call your vet. They can:

• Confirm the passing if you're uncertain
• Provide guidance on next steps
• Arrange for aftercare services
• Offer emotional support

If it's after hours: Most vet clinics have emergency numbers or can direct you to 24-hour emergency animal hospitals.

3. Decide on Immediate Care

Your pet's body needs to be kept cool. Here are your immediate options:

If it's cool outside (below 60°F/15°C):

• You can keep your pet at home for up to 24 hours
• Place them in a cool, private space
• Wrap them gently in a favorite blanket

If it's warm:

• Contact your vet or pet cremation service within a few hours
• If you must wait, place your pet in the coolest room with air conditioning
• Some people use ice packs wrapped in towels (placed near, not directly touching)

4. Notify Close Family Members

If others in your household were close to your pet, let them know gently and give them the opportunity to say goodbye if they wish.

The First 24 Hours: Practical Decisions

Deciding on Aftercare

You don't have to decide immediately, but within the first day, you'll need to choose:

Private/Individual Cremation ($200-$500+ AUD)

• Your pet is cremated individually
• You receive their ashes back in an urn
• Takes 5-10 business days typically
• Best if you want to keep or scatter their ashes

Communal Cremation ($100-$250 AUD)

• Your pet is cremated with others
• You don't receive ashes back
• Usually more affordable
• Still respectful and dignified

Burial ($50-$500+ AUD)

• Home burial (check local council regulations first)
• Pet cemetery burial
• Consider: permanence, if you might move, local laws

Aquamation/Water Cremation ($280-$520 AUD)

• Gentler, eco-friendly alternative to cremation
• You receive ashes back
• Available in major cities (Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane)

You don't have to decide alone. Your vet can explain options, show you urns, and help you understand costs. There's no "right" choice—only what feels right for you.

Handling Paperwork

Your vet or cremation service will need:

• Your contact information
• Decision on aftercare
• Any special requests (paw print, fur clipping)
• Payment information

Most services are compassionate and understanding—take your time with forms.

If You Have Other Pets

Other animals in your home may sense something is wrong:

• Let them see or sniff their companion if possible (helps them understand)
• Maintain their routine as much as possible
• Watch for behavior changes (not eating, excessive meowing/barking, searching)
• Give extra comfort but don't overwhelm them
• Some pets grieve visibly; others seem unaffected—both are normal

The First 72 Hours: Taking Care of Yourself

It's Okay to Not Be Okay

You might experience:

• Numbness or shock ("This doesn't feel real")
• Intense crying spells
• Anger or guilt
• Physical symptoms (can't eat, can't sleep, headaches)
• Moments of forgetting they're gone, then remembering

All of this is normal grief. You're not overreacting. Your pet was family.

Immediate Self-Care

Do:

• Drink water (grief is physically exhausting)
• Eat something, even if small
• Take a shower or bath
• Rest when you can
• Call a friend who understands
• Let yourself cry
• Take time off work if possible

Don't:

• Make major life decisions right now
• Pressure yourself to "get over it"
• Isolate completely
• Compare your grief to others'
• Rush to get another pet

Dealing with Your Pet's Belongings

You don't have to do this immediately. Some people find comfort in keeping things as they were for a while. Others need to create some space. Both are okay.

When you're ready:

• Keep favorite toys or collar in a memory box
• Donate unused food/supplies to a shelter in their honor
• Give away items gradually if it feels too hard all at once
• It's okay to keep their bed or bowls if it brings comfort

Common Questions People Ask

"Is it normal that I can't stop crying?"
Yes. Completely normal. Cry as much as you need.

"Why do I feel guilty?"
Guilt is a common grief response. You may second-guess decisions, wish you'd noticed something sooner, or feel guilty for moments you were impatient. Remember: you did your best with the information and resources you had. Your pet felt loved.

"People don't understand why I'm so upset."
Not everyone gets it. Find people who do—online pet loss communities, understanding friends, or pet loss support hotlines. Your grief is valid regardless of others' reactions.

"When will this stop hurting?"
The intense pain will soften, but there's no timeline. Most people find the first few weeks hardest, but grief comes in waves. Be patient with yourself.

"Should I get another pet right away?"
Usually, no. Give yourself time to grieve. A new pet deserves your full heart, not to be a Band-Aid for grief. When you think of a new pet with excitement (not just to fill the void), you might be ready.

Helpful Resources

Australian Pet Loss Support Services:

• Pets and People Pet Loss Hotline: 1300 431 450 (24/7, counselling rates apply)
• Griefline Australia: 1300 845 745 (8am-8pm, 7 days, AEST/AEDT)
• Lifeline Australia: 13 11 14 (24/7 crisis support)

Online Communities:

• r/Petloss on Reddit
• Pets and People website: petsandpeople.com.au
• Facebook groups: "Pet Loss Support Australia"

Books:

• "Goodbye, Friend" by Gary Kowalski
• "The Loss of a Pet" by Wallace Sife

Remember This

Your pet's life mattered. The grief you feel is a testament to the love you shared. There's no "right way" to grieve, and there's no timeline you need to follow.

In these first hours and days, be gentle with yourself. Do what you need to do to get through each moment. Reach out when you need support. And know that while the pain is intense now, you will find a way to carry this loss and still honor the joy your pet brought to your life.

Your pet was lucky to have you. And you were lucky to have them.

If you're struggling and need immediate support, please reach out to a pet loss hotline or speak with your veterinarian. You don't have to go through this alone.